The Most Convenient Food Ever

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Food science is wonderful, and this is truly amazing. Did you know you can purchase 100% nutritionally complete, healthy food, all in a single bag? There are age-appropriate formulas for all life stages, from infant to senior, and you can’t beat the convenience. Just measure out the appropriate amount of bite-sized nuggets and munch away! It’s full of protein, fruits, vegetables, has grain-free formulas for those with gluten intolerance, and even has essential vitamins and minerals added, and a tasty coating to enhance its natural flavor. Doesn’t that sound great?

What? No? It doesn’t?

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Of course, it doesn’t. But that’s exactly what the majority of people feed their dogs. You wouldn’t feed your child or yourself this way, because you’re not an idiot. You understand that a diet consisting solely of highly-processed ingredients, cooked at high heat and dried, is not healthy. You need fresh meat, vegetables, fruits, all in as wide a variety as possible to be truly healthy.

Even the cheapest, most crap-and-filler-laden commercial food carries the “seal of imagesapproval” from the Association of American Feed Control Officers (AAFCO) as “100% nutritionally complete.” But AAFCO is not the FDA–or a government agency at all. It’s a private corporation, basically the fox watching the hen house. All their “approval” means is the bag contains what it says it contains, and if a pet is fed this particular food exclusively…it isn’t likely to die of starvation or malnutrition. It in no way certifies the ingredients are of any sort of quality.

If you (or your child) ate nothing but dried cereal, ramen, and hot dogs every day, you probably wouldn’t die. But would you be healthy? How much healthier would you be if you ate those things, but also added fresh meat, fruits, and vegetables?

I see it all the time in various dog groups. “What kind of food is best for my (insert breed here)?” They get a range of replies from the most expensive, organic, grain-free brands with exotic proteins like kangaroo or pheasant, to “I feed Crap-In-A-Bag from Costco, and my dogs have always done fine on it.” They choose a brand and buy that same bag, same variety, month after month, year after year.

At the very least, they should change the protein each time. Get beef, then the next time the chicken and turkey, then the lamb, then the salmon. The only variety some dogs get is the occasional pizza crust or tidbit from their people’s plates or what they manage to scavenge from the trash. No wonder they’re garbage-hounds. They’re starving for real food.

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I’m not anti-kibble. I feed about 50% grain-free dry food, because the tree that fell across my fence last year didn’t have $100 bills for leaves and I have two large-breed dogs who like to eat a couple of times a day.

You don’t have to go all-out with a totally raw diet. It’s not for everybody. But no matter which commercial brand you buy, you can make it healthier. At the very least, you can mix in a raw egg, or plain yogurt, or ground beef or turkey, some raw liver, or shredded and lightly steamed leafy greens or sweet potato, or a handful of fresh blueberries. Any or all of these once a day will go a long way to add high-quality nutrition and natural enzymes and probiotics to your dog’s diet.

There are complete frozen raw diets available at most pet supply stores. Not so much the “big box” stores, but your local or regional shops. These contain a range of proteins, bone, vegetables, and fruits, and can be used to supplement kibble. There are freeze-dried or dehydrated foods. I’m currently buying Sojos freeze-dried. I mix that up, then stir in the dry food.

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If raw grosses you out, cook it–but don’t over-cook it. There are all kinds of “stew” recipes out there for dogs. Put it in your slow cooker and add some to your dog’s food every day.

You don’t have to be a food chemist or a chef. Simply put a little thought into what you feed your dog. Just as you eat some processed convenience foods but also recognize the value of whole, healthy, natural foods, do the same for your dog. Convenience is…convenient. But the dog you love deserves more.

PS: While writing this post, I encountered THIS article taking a similar look at “dog food for people.” It was an April Fool’s story, and…It. Is. Hilarious.

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The Dreaded Spoilers

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We’ve all had it happen. A new movie comes out, and some ass-crumpet posts a pivotal detail on social media before you have a chance to see it. A TV series airs in another country or time zone before it airs in yours, and though you promised to stay off Facebook, you pop in for “just a minute” and discover a favorite character is dead.

Wails, anguish, threats of swift and blinding retribution.

But there’s another kind of spoiler, one some viewers actually seek out. Let’s skip movies for now, since I rarely watch movies, though I did watch Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri yesterday. (Spoiler alert: There are billboards. Three of them. Outside Ebbing, Missouri.)

Television episodes are provided to select reviewers before the episode airs, and some of them work with fandom sites to reveal key information before it is broadcast. They can’t just post them anywhere, though, or the network will quickly figure out who it is, and their early-review days are over.

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One such group is The Spoiling Dead Fans, though they got a lot of heat from AMC, and now the spoilers are shared in a closed group, TSDF Army. Around Wednesday or Thursday before the Sunday US premiere of an episode, a Q&A covering key story developments appears, and lots of people read them.

I do.

The Spoiling Dead Fans has over 450,000 likes on Facebook. The closed TSDF Army group has over 40,000 members.

Why would anyone want to know what happens before an episode? For me, it’s a combination of anxiety and immediate gratification. I admit, I do sometimes skip the spoilers for a huge episode like a season premiere or finale, but I usually read the spoilers for The Walking Dead. I’m a highly anxious person, and I’ll get so worked up with the anticipation and tension that I can’t enjoy the program itself. I’m also very Veruca Salt, and “I want it now.” No waiting. I want to know, so just tell me, already. If I know, I can mentally prepare myself for anything disturbing, or pay closer attention as the revelation of something exciting approaches.

There have been exceptions. I didn’t read about the season finale as we awaited who would Negan bash in the head…and regretted it. I’d heard rumors of a possible cliffhanger, but refused to believe they’d do that to fans. And they did. And I was furious. There’s nothing worse for an immediate-gratification person than having to wait six months for an answer. I still hate Scott Gimple. So. Much.

There have also been a few times even TSDF Army declined to post a spoiler. Most notably was when Chandler Riggs himself contacted them and asked them not to reveal Carl’s impending death. Because he asked politely and respectfully, and was humble and mature about it, they agreed.

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Right now, their source has decided not to provide spoilers for the upcoming final two episodes of the current season. This is his or her prerogative, and we don’t have any right to complain. We’re not entitled to spoilers. There are rumors out there, but very little of it can be confirmed. So I’m going into tonight’s episode with not much concrete information. I kind of hate it, but I understand.

How do you feel about spoilers, either the right-after-it-airs kind, or the pre-broadcast ones? And after a movie or episode is out there, how long is the appropriate time to refrain from posting spoilers on social media? I mean, it’s not realistic to keep your thoughts and opinions to yourself for months, just because someone is waiting for a movie to hit Amazon, or because someone is a season behind in binge-watching The Walking Dead. I think a week, maybe two, is fair. If seeing the movie or series isn’t your priority, you have to accept the risk.

As for tonight, I very strongly suspect one particular death. I have some good hunches about a few other developments. But I’m going in with a lot less information than I typically have, and there’s only one thing I can say about that…

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Doctor Who Universe

A couple of months ago, I started watching Doctor Who for the first time. Just the modern seasons, not the originals. I’ve now finished all ten current seasons, and I have to say I like it…but I don’t love it. I’m not a crazed fan, and if they said there wouldn’t be any more seasons, I wouldn’t be heartbroken. I liked it enough to watch all ten seasons, though.

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My favorite Doctor is definitely 11, Matt Smith, and my favorite companion is Amy. I liked Rose, despite her awful makeup that seemed to run off her face every time she cried, which was a lot, and never took to Martha Jones much. Then Amy came along, and I really loved her story arc.

When the 12th Doctor came along, I tried to like Peter Capaldi, but he was more dour and less quirky than #11, and I never fully connected with him. I thought I’d like Bill a lot, but ultimately she was mostly just okay.

My favorite episode overall was the one with Amy and van Gogh. It was poignant and thought-provoking and definitely hit all the feels. There’s even a knitting pattern for a scarf like Amy wore, and I’m probably going to make it.

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I suppose I’m looking forward a bit to the introduction of the first female Doctor in season 11, but not with “watch the calendar” enthusiasm.

Then I moved on to Torchwood. I’d say I like it about the same as Doctor Who. I know a lot of viewers are enthralled by John Barrowman, but he doesn’t do it for me. He’s not a very good actor, and I know he’s supposed to be the dashing hero, but he looks like a cookie cutter right out of central casting, or a cartoon of the handsome Captain Jack Harkness brought to life.

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There’s not a particular character or relationship that resonates with me, and I’m not sure why. I know Owen was supposed to be the good-looking rascal, but I seriously hoped he was going to be killed off at the end of season 1. He annoys me.

The relationship between Gwen and Rhys seems forced and isn’t enhancing the storyline. Ianto is potentially interesting, but feels two-dimensional. He does have some of the best deadpan one-liners, though. Tosh is okay, too, but not terribly compelling.

But I’m only a few episodes into season 2, so maybe that will all develop more.

Who are your favorites and least favorites on Doctor Who and Torchwood? Are there aspects I’m missing? I did enjoy seeing James Marsters in his guest role on Torchwood. I also liked the Eugene Jones episode, so I’m hoping there are even better episodes ahead.

Honor…and Hope

WARNING. Contains spoilers of The Walking Dead season 8 mid-season premiere. If you haven’t seen the episode, steer clear.

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Unless you’re seasons behind in watching and have also miraculously not seen any mention on social media of the season 8 mid-season finale a couple of months ago, you knew this was coming. There were those who held onto the thin thread of hope that it was all another elaborate plot by TWD producers to mislead viewers, but I never believed it.

I knew Carl was going to die.

I wasn’t really upset about his impending death. Carl was never one of my favorite characters, and I’ve hated that damned sheriff’s hat since about season 3. I figured it would be sad, sure, but didn’t expect to get too worked up about it.

And then I spent half the episode ugly-crying. Where did that come from?

While Carl was never my favorite character, I do understand and respect his place in the TWD universe. We now have only three of the Atlanta originals left–Rick, Carol, and Daryl. He was Rick’s prime motivation to fight, survive, and try to build something in the post-apocalyptic world. He was the vulnerable little boy everyone watched grow into a competent young man. The death of the kid they thought would make it, who matured into a true survivor, is going to rock everyone’s foundations.

My apathy toward Carl is in contrast to how I feel about Chandler Riggs. He’s a well-spoken, intelligent, charming, talented, humble guy, and I’m going to miss him. I’m sure he has great things ahead of him, and I can’t wait to see what he does next. And thank goodness, he finally got a big-boy haircut.

A few random thoughts about the episode…

Everyone on my live chat sort of fell apart in the first five minutes when Carl was having his “last normal moments” in Alexandria. He was writing goodbye notes, making blue hand prints on the porch of their house and taking Instamatic selfies with little Judith, and turning his face to the sun and smiling, knowing he’d never feel the sunlight again.

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It was kind of brutally beautiful.

Down in the tunnels, where Carl guided everyone to hide out from Negan’s goons, there were final interactions with those close to him, and we learned Siddiq was a doctor, or at least a resident, meaning Carl brought someone of immense value to the group, at the cost of his own life. Daryl indicates all the people gathered there, and reminds Carl they’re all there, safe and alive, because of him, then goes to take Judith to safety.

But that bleeping hat. I hate that hat. I’d hoped for a ceremonial hat-burning, but my hopes went unfulfilled. He gave the stupid thing to Judith. Please, please, don’t let me have to watch six seasons of little blonde Judith bopping around and dodging walkers while wearing that ridiculous hat.

Each time the episode cut back to a Carl scene, he looked worse. The makeup was amazing, and I was shocked to see him look so…diseased.

Some viewers are angry that his ultimate demise took place off screen, but I think it was appropriate. I really didn’t want to see his skull explode, a la Beth at Grady Memorial. He chose his exit, and I’m fine with it. The whole thing was devastating enough for Rick and Michonne, who had to go back in and remove his body for burial. They didn’t need to witness it.

Also, Michonne was a better apocalypse-mom than Lori ever was.

The message Carl was determined to pass on to Rick before he died was the one thing everyone needs most at this time in their apocalyptic journey. Hope. Hope that they can still build something meaningful in this new reality without completely losing themselves to the darkness. No, it’s not realistic for Rick–or anyone–to go back to his season 1 mantra, “We don’t kill the living,” but Carl wants to remind him it’s okay to show mercy sometimes. To fight for your people, but retain some humanity.

Even though at times in earlier seasons it appeared Carl was “going to the dark side,” at the end, he expressed the guilt and remorse he felt, even now, for shooting that kid who was surrendering to him and Hershel in the woods outside the prison.

So, reluctantly, we bid farewell to Carl Grimes. But another development has me wondering if perhaps there’s a new little-boy badass in the making…Henry.

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Fun note, though most dedicated fans already know…Henry is played by Macsen Lintz, the little brother of Madison Lintz, who portrayed Sophia in seasons 1 and 2.

What do you think? Did you react to Carl’s death the way you expected? How is this void in their lives going to affect your favorite characters?

All I know is…I can’t wait until next week. I hope we’ll find out what’s going on with Enid and the Oceanside gang after she accidentally shot Grandma in the mid-season finale.

The Dog’s Dinner

The most important decision we make for our pets’ health is what we feed them. If you watch the news or frequent social media, it seems every week there is a new pet food recall. No brand is exempt. Even top-quality foods can receive a tainted ingredient from a supplier, or there could be an error in processing, or something can happen while a shipment is being transported or stored which allows heat or moisture to cause food to spoil.

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The latest story involves several brands of foods manufactured by companies owned by Smucker’s, including Ol’ Roy, Kibbes & Bits, and Gravy Train. Testing has found pentobarbital in the products…the drug used to euthanize animals. While the levels aren’t high enough to be lethal, it’s not permitted in any amount, for obvious reasons.

There are cries of “how is this getting into our pets’ food in the first place?” If you feed these brands, and if you’ve ever looked at the labels, you shouldn’t be surprised. This is less about “OMG, there’s a toxic chemical in Fluffy’s num-nums” and more about “I bought the cheapest food on the market which is made of crap ingredients.”

Manufacturers will screech with indignation if you suggest they use protein sources contaminated with high levels of antibiotics, steroids, or delicious, delicious pentobarbital. Sure, technically, they don’t knowingly buy euthanized kittens in a back alley and toss them in the processing vats. “No, we absolutely do not use euthanized animals in our food. That would be very, very wrong. Must be the supplier. We had no idea.” (Yes, they did.) This is plausible deniability.

So, how does it get in there? I remember years ago, a local rendering plant had a broken boiler. It took a long time to repair, and bodies of animals awaiting processing were piling up outside the building. Photos clearly showed livestock and roadkill–and even the carcasses of domestic animals.

High quality foods use proteins from facilities designed to process animals in clean, safe conditions, and in some cases, even meeting human-grade food processing standards. An ingredient list would show beef, chicken, lamb, turkey, or other named, single-source items on the label, and if you ask, they should be able to tell you the specific source.

Let’s look at the ingredients in Ol’ Roy dog food.

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There are so many barf-worthy ingredients, I barely know where to begin, but let’s look at the proteins first.

Meat and bone meal is the second ingredient. Okay, Roy, define “meat.” Any time you see this, or the fifth ingredient here, “animal fat,” or “animal by-product meal,” that’s a huge red flag. Those non-specific proteins are exactly the sort that come from these rendering and processing plants, where animals of all sorts are tossed in the vat and boiled, extruded, dried, and shipped off to substandard food manufacturers.

Think about what kinds of animals would end up in those facilities. Quality food producers, whether for humans or pets, harvest healthy animals and process them in sanitary conditions. In a rendering plant, producing these generic protein sources, you’ll find what’s known as the 4 Ds–Dead, Dying, Diseased, or Disabled. Awesome, right?

You don’t euthanize healthy animals. For pentobarbital to be in pet food, you don’t have to think very hard to realize a dying or diseased animal, which needed to be “put out of its misery,” is in that bag or can. Is that what you want to feed your animal companion?

“Natural flavor” is usually some sort of blood slurry, from any and every animal being processed. Yummy!

This food also contains BHA as a preservative. The primary use for this chemical is as a preservative in makeup and moisturizers, as well as in low-quality food. It is a suspected endocrine disruptor and possible carcinogen.

Ground yellow corn is the first ingredient. Hey, it’s cheap, so they can make a low-cost food. There’s also corn gluten meal (when you need even more corn and only have odds and ends left) and brewer’s rice. Brewer’s rice sounds good, right? Nope. It’s the tiny milled fragments left over when whole grain rice is processed. Basically, it’s the sweepings off the floor.

I’m not anti-kibble. It’s an economical, convenient option for most pet-owners. I feed my dogs half grain-free kibble and half raw food, and have for years.

Why grain-free? Dogs and cats are not built to digest or metabolize grain-based carbohydrates. Rather than being utilized to build a healthy body, most of it ends up on the other end of the pooper-scooper. If a wild canine gets grain, it’s typically from the digestive tract of a prey animal, and already partially digested. If a coyote invades your farm, it’s going to eat your chickens or goats, not graze in your corn or wheat field.

Grains are also a key source of allergens in pets. If Snoopy has chronic itchy skin, hot spots, anal gland problems, or ear infections, it very well might be a food allergy, and the source is much more likely to be a grain than a protein. So I don’t feed my dogs any grains, ever, not even in treats.

Ol’ Roy also has chemical color additives, added salt, soy (another allergy trigger for many dogs) and so many things I can’t pronounce that it boggles the mind. If you’re feeding this, your dog is better off if you simply feed him your leftovers, excluding things that are harmful to dogs, such as onions.

I get it. Quality pet food is expensive. Not everyone can afford $70 a bag. I’ve found Earthborn Holistic is an economical, good-quality, grain-free brand, and there are many more from which to choose these days. It’s an investment in your pet’s health. Spending a little more for food will save you a lot more in veterinary expenses down the road.

Sadly, in most cases, you have to do the homework. Veterinarians are given very little education on pet nutrition in school, and what they do receive is sponsored by large pet food manufacturers. Unless your vet has taken the initiative to educate themselves, they don’t know much more than the average pet owner about pet food.

We all have specific needs, a budget, and time constraints. But don’t look at the bouncy puppies on the pet food commercials, or look at the AAFCO certification on the bag (which means absolutely nothing beyond your dog won’t starve to death), or blindly accept what your vet tells you to feed. Learn to read labels. Learn what the ingredients mean. Subscribe to Whole Dog Journal.

It’s unfortunate, but the burden of deciding what to feed your pets rests solely on your shoulders. You (probably) wouldn’t feed your child a diet of nothing but generic mac and cheese and bologna, because while they wouldn’t starve to death, they certainly wouldn’t be very healthy, so don’t feed the animal equivalent to your pet.

Let The Games (and Spoilers) Begin

It seems the 2018 Winter Olympics are now underway. How much time will you spend watching?

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I used to be an enthusiastic Olympics-watcher. You’d think all the technology and TV networks would make it easier to watch the events, but I find it much harder.

When I was a kid in the 1970s, it was all pretty simple. The host network might air a few of the less-popular competitions in the afternoon or late at night, but if  you weren’t home during the day or willing to stay up until three a.m., you were shit out of luck because this was in the prehistoric, pre-VCR days.

All the most-anticipated events aired during prime time every evening, and the whole family watched together. This was also before the internet and social media, so you didn’t have to worry about avoiding spoilers. The evening news, if something earth-shattering had happened during the day, would always helpfully warn you to look away or turn down the volume before revealing any spoilery details. Time zones? Forget it. The Olympics happened from 7-11 p.m., regardless.

In the 1980s, when I was a young at-home mom, I watched a lot of Olympic coverage. Cable was by then a thing, and the host’s partner networks let me watch more than ever, and I sort of cared. I actually had a childhood friend, Amy Gamble, compete in the 1988 Summer Olympics in Seoul, and everyone made a point to follow the hometown girl. I also edited her book last year, and you should absolutely check it out! Bipolar Disorder, My Greatest Competitor: An Olympian’s Journey With Mental Illness is incredible.

Now, though, it’s almost like there are so many viewing options I can’t even start. No matter the time of day, there’s something being broadcast on the host network, or one of the other networks they own. News, events, recaps, specials, retrospectives…who has that kind of time?

It’s different than having a favorite sports team or race car driver. You follow them every season, year after year, and have a lot of emotional energy invested in their performance. The Olympics, however, are made up of 99% people I’ve never heard of, or athletes I literally haven’t given a single thought in the past four years. Other than national pride–which is getting harder and harder to manufacture these days–the emotional investment isn’t there.

I haven’t watched any of these sports since the previous Games. I only vaguely recall the rules or how they’re scored, other than they all seem to involve either “go fast,” “don’t fall down,” or some combination of the two. I don’t know if the guy from Transylbergerstan hates the other guy from Blombodia because he beat him out by one point or 0.00001 second in the last big ski thing.

Thanks to social media, there’s no way to avoid pesky spoilers unless you totally unplug and vigilantly monitor every flip of the channel (or simply watch nothing but Netflix) so you don’t accidentally give away the outcome of the event you planned to watch later. Which, for most of us, is not an option.

I guess I can appreciate the edge-of-control thrill of luge, skeleton, downhill skiing, or bobsledding. Ice skating can be entertaining. Overall, though, I prefer the summer Olympics. Gymnastics has been a favorite event for me since Olga Korbut in 1972, though I wonder if I’ll feel the same for the 2020 Summer Olympics, or if knowing now what so many of those girls have gone through will taint the experience. Maybe it will make their strength and determination even more impressive.

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Every little girl wanted to fly like this. I used to spend hours performing “floor routines” in the front yard, and was even briefly on the Y gymnastics team…but I quit before the first competition because team sports are so not my thing.

I sincerely admire the monumental accomplishment each athlete achieved by becoming an Olympian. That’s a dream far beyond what most of us could ever imagine. I wish them all well, and for thrilling competitions, but the tension and conflict are a bit overwhelming for me.

You’ll find me here in my usual spot in the evenings, watching The Vampire Diaries on Netflix.